Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate people, as it’s the morning of New Year’s Eve…and you know what THAT means…heinous hangovers are just a short 24 hours away. Just in time for the holiday, I happened upon a commercial last night for ChaserOnline, a “hangover prevention supplement” that supposedly relieves the goddawful side effects of heavy drinking.
I’m not proud of the fact that I’ve turned into a lightweight in my mature days, getting cottonmouth, an uneasy stomach, and incapacitating headaches after only two glasses of champagne. (Of late, I’m blaming it on the 5,280 foot altitude). So if ChaserOnline truly does live up to its claim, I’ll take three boxes please (and two more for my brother).
This magical anti-hangover supplement evidently works due to “specially processed calcium carbonate and charcoal. These two ingredients attract and absorb hangover-causing toxins and then safely pass them out of your system.” Ummm, did they just say charcoal? As in the kind of charcoal that’s “the blackish residue consisting of impure carbon obtained by removing water and other volatile constituents from animal and vegetation substances???” Naaaasty.
Admiteddly, my current cure for hangovers consisting of the consumption of bloody mary’s, coupious amounts of fried food, and gatorade isn’t the healthiest prescription…but consuming “blackish residue?” Me no likey. I’d rather drink numerous flutes of the cheapest rose champagne on the market and face the concequences. Or Veuve. Or Dom. Or Cristal. I’m flexible, really. Now excuse me, I’m off to hydrate.
